Thursday, May 28, 2009

New Father's Survival Kit #10: A Cool-Ass Father-In-law

I shit you not. My father-in-law made this.

Holy shit, right? Motherfucker! Three letters for you... L ... S ... D ...

The Father-in-Law, whom we shall call The Matrix! from here on in, made this in Photoshop and posted it on his fucking Facebook. That's him, and my mother-in-law, like three Jurassic Periods ago, when they got married. And he put this space-age organic white arboretum around them and set them on another planet, the planet, FunnyPixel, and he's like, YUP, A DAY'S WORK IS DONE. (I'm waiting for a version with Montana Wildhack in it!)

Look out ghost of Rauchenberg... There's another mad genius down in Florida making some kick-ass art. I mean, you bring that shit up to New York, and I swear, he'd be making serious dough and banging some serious art groupies (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE..., YES, YOU...)

I mean, look at that thing!!!

And The Matrix! is doing all this sans LSD. For reals. This is just how his motherboard is wired. This is natural. I mean, sure, I think he's taking the Lipitor and whatever else old folks take to keep themselves practically immortal these days.

But I mean, is that not the coolest motherfucking thing you have seen in a while.

Yup, that's my father-in-law, The Matrix!

1 comment:

  1. It's looks like he got married on the cover of a Future Sound of London album. Come to think of it, they would be the coolest, freakiest, most tripped out wedding band ever. Still... totally appropriate so long as you're happy having your first dance to "We Have Explosive."